Heal My Heart Once More
by Guitar Addict 90
Summary: [Rinoa/Squall/Quistis] Afraid of their growing relationship, Squall Leonhart tries to break off all ties to Rinoa Heartilly. But two years later, when fate brings them together once again, he realizes he never stopped caring for her. Thing is, *she has*.
1. Hurtful Goodbyes

  
  
**Title**: Heal My Heart Once More  
  
**Rating**: PG for now  
  
**Summary**: [Rinoa/Squall/Quistis] Afraid of their growing relationship, Squall Leonhart tries to break off all ties to Rinoa Heartilly. But two years later, when fate brings them together once again, he realizes he never stopped caring for her. Thing is, *she has*.  
  
**Author's Note**: Hello, out there! This is my first Final Fantasy VIII fic… well, the first I'm actually posting. ^_^; Is it just me, or is there something so WAFFy (Warm And Fuzzy Feeling) about Squall/Rinoa fics? I mean, they're all (well, mostly) so beautifully portrayed (i.e. Ashbear and Wayward Tempest). I'm such in a Squall/Rinoa mood right now because I just read a **ton** of them. But I really like Quistis/Squall fics too, for some odd reason (but not when there's Rinoa bashing in them). Maybe it's because I really dislike Seifer, and right now there's a huge load of Seifer/Quistis fics out (ew…), which I personally don't enjoy. Of course, that's just **my** preference.   
  
So here's a Rinoa/Squall/Quistis fic. I have no idea where it's going or what's going to happen, but we'll see. I had written an earlier one that I was actually quite proud of, but I forgot to save it and then my dad shut off the computer… Wah… So I'm trying to rack my brain, trying to remember at least some of the good parts I had written in it. The final pairing does not depend on how many votes each couple receives, but if you want, you can vote. And please review. Flames are accepted, as long as they are tactful and helpful along the way. Thank you!   
  


*

  
  
_ Prologue: "Hurtful Good-byes"  
  
"Rinoa? Say something, please," Squall Leonhart pleaded as her stared at her intently.   
  
Rinoa Heartilly stared back at him defiantly. "What do you **want** me to say?" Bitterness was clear in her voice. There was no way she could comprehend what he was telling her: that he never loved her in the first place; that he loved someone else; that all the time they had spent together was in vain. She couldn't believe it; how could she even have **tried** to reach him? It was impossible; that's what everyone said. But she was determined to get him to open up to her; Squall Leonhart was a mystery that she wanted to solve, yet she didn't even know why. His persona and character simply **drew** her to him; there was no logical explanation for it. And now he was pushing her away again…   
  
Squall took a deep breath. He knew this would be hard for her, but he didn't know it would be hard for **him** as well. He tried to convince himself that what he was feeling was not love; it was just a figment of his imagination. He didn't **deserve** such a person as her. She was beautiful… perfect. There was no way she could've ever been drawn to him. The new feelings he was experiencing… he was so **afraid**. He could trust her physically, yes; but emotionally? Could someone ever love him? Surely a character such as Rinoa would want a more outgoing personality in him… but no. She liked him the way he was, and he knew it. He was just afraid… this was a whole new world for him.   
  
Perhaps that is why the concept of pushing her away became so appealing to him; he wouldn't have to deal with these **feelings** that were emerging. And at least there was someone who was still waiting for him; someone that he knew he could always turn to: Quistis Trepe. Yes, he had felt like they were **bound** to be together from the beginning. It wasn't that he didn't **like** her; he just never took the time to get to **know** her. And he knew she still loved him… They were alike. They had things in common. But him and Rinoa?… Almost nothing. They were completely different.   
  
Rinoa ventured again. "What do you **want** me to say, Squall? 'Oh, I understand?' 'I'm so happy for you and Quistis?' **What** is **it**, Squall? It's always about **you**, isn't it? That's how it's always been; that's how it always **will** be." She tried to hold the tears that were threatening to fall; she couldn't let him see her falter… she couldn't let him see her cry because of **him**.   
  
She had thought she had reached him; and was somewhat proud of being the only one to do so. But now… He meant so **much** to her, yet she couldn't let him see that now. All the time they had spent together… laughing (even though most of the time she was the only one laughing) and just joking around with each other… She had thought it had meant at least a **little** to him.   
  
Wanting to leave as soon as possible before she started to cry, Rinoa blurted, "I'm leaving. I'm going home tomorrow. I don't want to **see** or **hear** from you again; understand? If you even **try**, General Caraway will take care of you." She used a threat to make him see just how **serious** she was.   
  
Despite the emotion he was feeling, Squall held back a laugh. "General Caraway? Rinoa, he can't do anything to **me**. I'm the **Commander** of Balamb **Garden**. I can do whatever I want; Caraway can't tell me what to do." His smug attitude was surprising and a little out of character.   
  
Rinoa actually thought that he had sounded just like **her** at that moment; smug and boastful, always ready with a retort. She had taught him well. His ego was getting the best of him at that moment, and now small tears were running down her rosy cheeks. They had definitely spent much time together if she was beginning to rub off on him. But she didn't want any of it to end like he did.   
  
"What about **Cid?** Anything he says, goes. You're like a little puppet, Squall. You do whatever **he** tells you to do, no matter how unreasonable… Why couldn't you do anything for **me?** Why can't you see that I don't want what **you** want?" She decided to be truthful with him; it was her last chance for reconciliation.   
  
Squall couldn't bear it anymore. She was crying… because of **him**. He had never meant to **hurt** her intentionally, but he decided this was for the best. Rinoa needed someone else who could give her everything she wanted… love, care, attention… He wasn't fit to give her any of that; he didn't show emotion most of the time. And if she wanted a public relationship, he couldn't do it. He couldn't have their relationship publicly displayed before the world. He turned around, his back facing her. He couldn't say anything; he just wanted her to leave before he broke down altogether.   
  
She sensed an uncomfortable silence, and decided to leave before things got out of hand. She was surprised she hadn't slapped him like she **should** have… no; she couldn't slap the face of the man she loved. Even though she hated him with everything in her being now, she knew that she cared deeply for him; perhaps past the point of even love, if there was such a point of feelings.   
  
Turning on her heel, she said over her shoulder coldly, "Good-bye, **Commander Leonhart**. Have a nice life." She choked back the tears and strode out of the room, hoping her effect got across and that he'd call for her to come back.   
  
But he didn't. And she was disappointed and angry as she left.   
  
Squall hung his head in shame. He **wanted** her to come back, but convinced himself this was for the best. A minor bump in life. Everything should be rolling along fine now. He just needed to forget Rinoa and move on.   
  
**Forget Rinoa?** He shook his head; that was nearly impossible. How could he forget the first woman he had ever fallen in love with? But he **had** to. They weren't right for each other… She needed someone like Seifer… Squall cringed at the thought. And did that mean he needed someone like Quistis? Someone who identified with him?   
  
He shut his eyes tightly. What had he **done?** Had he just let go of someone that was so important to him? So important, in fact, that after he himself broke them apart, he still thought of her? She was still on his mind. And he knew that she would be; not only today, but for the rest of his life…   
  


*

  
  
Knock, knock!_   
  
"Yo, Squall! You in there? The party's about to start, man." Zell Dincht's voice was muffled by the thick door. He pounded on it again. "Hey! At least give me **some** sign that you're alive!"   
  
Squall sat on his bed. He had been, for the past half-hour. Thinking… like he did every night. Only, tonight was different; **tonight** was the annual SeeD inauguration ball. Last year, he had taken a sick leave, since he couldn't **stand** going to parties like those; with reporters, photographers, and all of Balamb Garden watching him every second? One could understand why he didn't like them. Cid had excused him the other year, fully aware of how much pain Squall would feel, going to the ball that he had met Rinoa in…   
  
But this year, he convinced himself to go. Quistis was extremely happy when he told her that he was going; after all, she **was** a bit wary of last year. If he had gotten over Rinoa as he claimed, why would he not want to go?   
  
Now Squall couldn't stop thinking about her. He stared at the floor blankly, closing his eyes briefly before standing up. He took one last glance in the mirror, making sure everything on his SeeD uniform was set in place. He noted the solemn look on his face as he strode to the door, opening it to see Zell and Irvine Kinneas.   
  
"Took you long enough! I'm so hungry; let's go!" Zell's enthusiastic behavior made Squall reassure himself that it wouldn't be as bad as he thought it would.   
  
_Who am I kidding?_ Squall thought glumly. _This is horrible; I should've **never** agreed to go._ But the plans were already in place; he couldn't back out now.   
  
As they made their way to the party, Squall only hoped that his lingering feelings for Rinoa would just go away for tonight. Because… if **she** was invited to the ball, Squall knew he would never be able to look back at his old life.   
  


*

  
  
**Author's Note**: How is it? Okay? Read and review, please! And… yes, I'm in a **very** Squinoa-y mood, as you can tell. XD Maybe I'll just make it a Squall/Rinoa… I dunno. This is probably the typical length of each chapter, though. Comments and suggestions in your review, please… Maybe Quistis will have an actual **role** in the next chapter… I've got an itch to make this a Squall/Rinoa (not literally XD), but it could be in part because while I'm writing this, I'm listening to "Eyes On Me." Hehe… ^^;   
  
Don't forget to read (well, you've obviously done the reading part) and review! (Now just push the "Go!" button in the bottom left corner… Teeheehee!)  
  
P.S. Squall/Rinoa fics somehow **magically** have a greater impact on you if you listen to "Eyes On Me" (especially the piano solo version) while reading the fic. Try it; I have! It works like a charm! Makes you cry, too… XD   
  



	2. Longings of the Heart

  
  
**Title**: Heal My Heart Once More  
  
**Rating**: PG for now  
  
**Summary**: [Rinoa/Squall/Quistis] Afraid of their growing relationship, Squall Leonhart tries to break off all ties to Rinoa Heartilly. But two years later, when fate brings them together once again, he realizes he never stopped caring for her. Thing is, **she has**.   
  
**Author's Note**: Hooray for reviews! ^^ Thank you so much for the comments, too. I'm sorry about the constant bolding; I'll try to lessen that… but I just want you to know that I purposely bolded certain words to get a certain effect on how you say it… but, oh well. Anything for my reviewers! XD So… everyone so far wants a Squall/Rinoa? No worries! I can do that. I have a feeling that this will turn into one, anyway, no matter how much I like Quistis. ;P Sorry, Quistis fans, but I think that she really won't have a main part until next chapter, so… don't be mad if she's not a major character in this chapter yet. >.  


*

  
  
_ Chapter 1: "Longings of the Heart"  
  
_ Squall held his breath as he stood at the entrance to the ballroom. Quistis held onto his left arm as his escort, and she knew he was nervous. Trying to soothe him, she gently rubbed her thumb in circles on his hand, and leaned towards him, whispering, "It's okay, Squall. We can do this. You'll be fine."  
  
He nodded slightly, still afraid to enter. _What if… Rinoa… no…_ He couldn't think of her now. It wasn't appropriate; he was here with Quistis. **Quistis** was his escort; not Rinoa. Besides, he wasn't even sure she would be here. There was no need for her to. Unless Cid invited her… but surely he wouldn't do such a thing as that? Rinoa **was** a part of defeating Ultimecia, though… She could be invited out of sheer politeness with regards to Balamb Garden… Squall shook his head. _Enough with the thoughts of Rinoa. If she's here, then she's here. There's nothing I have to say to her._ But, oh… in his heart he **longed** to say everything he felt to her…  
  
"Ready, Squall?" Quistis smiled brightly at him, looking down quickly to flatten out a crease on her dress.  
  
Squall didn't smile, but attempted to give a fake one. He had to admit, though, Quistis was indeed beautiful. Since she was an escort to the Commander of Balamb Garden, she was given a choice whether to wear her SeeD uniform or her own. Of course she wanted to wear one of her own. Squall had never seen her wear it before. It was a shimmering, smooth gold dress, which molded and clung to her body. Yes, she **did** look wonderful tonight. Her hair was all done and up, into a pretty bun, with expensive-looking gold earrings and a matching necklace. And, of course, to complete her ensemble, a gold band around her left fourth finger, with a rather large diamond heart on it, surrounded by smaller circular diamonds.  
  
This was the first time Quistis would be wearing the ring in public; a sign of their official marriage. And Squall was **very** nervous about it. That ring meant reporters from all over the world would be questioning them all night, taking endless pictures. And he **did not** want that.  
  
Squall gave her a polite nod. "Yeah… let's go."  
  


*

  
  
The ballroom was decorated wonderfully; if Squall remembered correctly, it look as it did two years ago, when… He closed his eyes tightly. _No more thinking about Rinoa… I'm here with Quistis… Yes, Quistis._ He opened his eyes again, a bit more relieved. _Just get through tonight, and everything will be okay…_ He looked over at Quistis, who looked delighted. No more was she clinging onto his arm like before; now she was conversing with the important people of the world, being ever so charming and polite to a certain President.  
  
"Oh, Laguna! You are quite funny… I don't think I've ever heard a father make jokes about his son like that in public." She smiled warmly at him.  
  
Squall, hearing his name, quickly turned around. What he saw was not pleasing to his eye: his wife chatting with his father. He made his way to them, grabbing Quistis' hand.  
  
"Squall?… What…" was all she could say as he dragged her away from his father.  
  
He looked on ahead as he made his way through the crowd, his teeth clenched. "I don't want you talking to my father," he said simply. He stopped and looked at the ground.  
  
"Why not?" Quistis brought a hand up to his cheek. "Honey, I was only being polite. After all, he **is** the President, you know… I'm sorry."  
  
At the feminine touch, Squall leaned into it, placing his hand over hers. "It's okay…" For a moment, he could pretend this was Rinoa; her touch, her smell… the way she felt in his arms. He closed his eyes as he wrapped his hands around her waist and drew her close, inhaling the fresh scent of her hair. _Rinoa…_  
  
Quistis sighed happily in his arms. She was so glad she had him. She gently hugged him back, then pulled away. She noticed his eyes were not yet opened. "Squall?"  
  
As he opened his eyes, they focused on Quistis… _Quistis; not Rinoa… not Rinoa._ "Yes?"  
  
She stared deeply into his eyes; they were so blank… so confused… so helpless. "Um… I just left Laguna there. I think it'd be impolite to leave him hanging, don't you?"  
  
Squall closed his eyes briefly before opening them again. "Yeah. Go. I'll just… get us some punch."  
  
Quistis gave him a little smile. "Thanks. I'll be right back, okay? After I talk with Laguna, Irvine and Selphie said they'd meet us."  
  
"Okay. Sounds good," he said in a monotone voice.  
  
She was still worried about him, but decided to let him mope a little. She knew when he needed to be alone.  
  
Squall scanned the ballroom for the drinks, and made his way through the crowd of people. Thank Hyne he'd gotten through all the reporters already; Cid was now taking care of them. Thankfully, they hadn't yet seen Quistis' ring…  
  
As he poured the second cup of punch, he felt a hand clap on his shoulder, and he turned around to see a grinning cowboy… except without the hat, for once.  
  
"Hey, Squall! Glad you came!… What's that, there? Oh, punch! I see. Me an' Selph are over at Table 14 over there, if you wanna stop by, okay? Say, where's Quistis? Oh, there she is. Talking with Sir Laguna. I guess that means me and Selph will have to go talk to him, too, huh? We haven't seen him in a while. Anyway, I'm gonna grab Selph so we can say hi to him. I'll see you later, Squall." He turned quickly and left Squall alone.  
  
Squall had stared at him the entire time he was talking, and sighed. _I wonder if Irvine managed to sneak some **real** alcohol in… He sounds like he's been drinking… Or maybe that's just Selphie rubbing off on him…_ He managed a weak smile to himself. He took the two glasses of punch and made his way to where Laguna was happily chatting with Quistis, and now Irvine, Zell, and Selphie. Suddenly, he almost tripped over himself when he caught a glimpse of **her**.  
  
She was simply beautiful; **his angel**. Her dress was similar to the one she wore… two years ago, except it was a bit longer this time, and more elegant. Her raven hair was down; simple, yet Squall loved it when her hair was like that… and… she was making her way… over… to… him?  
  
Squall gulped hard, trying to avoid looking at her, yet she stopped right in front of him… and to his surprise, she smiled happily at him, acting casual.  
  
Squall! Nice to see you! Oh," she said, looking at the punch glass he held in his left hand, "is this for me?" She giggled. "Thank you!" She took it from him delicately, and all he could do was stare at her sheer beauty…  
  
"Squall, is something wrong?" She looked down at her dress, afraid she had spilled some punch.  
  
"Uh…" He quickly averted his eyes from her, and looked instead at the floor. "No."  
  
"Oh…" She looked like she was going to say more, but just then, a blond man came from behind her and wrapped his arms around her, immediately giving her a kiss on her neck.  
  
She giggled, and turned around slightly in his arms, giving Seifer Almasy a quick kiss on the lips. Turning back to Squall, she saw a rather hurt look on his face. Feeling sympathetic, Rinoa pulled away from her boyfriend and touched Squall's free hand lightly. "Hey… you look like you aren't feeling good. Are you sick?"  
  
Squall looked up at her. He was so close to her… and his heart ached for her. He managed to compose his posture and the look on his face was solemn as he avoided eye contact with her. She was dating **Seifer Almasy** _(again)_, of all people…  
  
"Squall? You sure you don't want to leave or something?" her gentle voice asked worriedly. She hadn't seen him in years… was she was cause of his sudden illness? Surely he had not maintained certain feelings for her— **he** was the one who broke them up two years ago. And she couldn't have imagined it any other way. Squall was right; they didn't need each other. She had Seifer now. He was always there for her. But the look on his face as he saw Seifer and her kiss… her heart stung with compassion for him.  
  
Squall heard a snicker behind Rinoa. "What a wimp… after two years you **still** can't get over her?" A glint was in Seifer's cold eyes.  
  
Rinoa quickly jabbed her elbow into his stomach, smiling sweetly at Squall and ignoring the silent curses of her boyfriend, who was now clutching his stomach. She secretively covered a side of her mouth with a straight hand and whispered, "Don't mind Seifer. He's just a little jealous…" She winked.  
  
He tried not to look interested as he inspected the floor again and said, "Whatever."  
  
She smiled knowingly at him. " _'Whatever,'_ indeed. I'll see you later… We're meeting up with the guys later on." She held her glass of punch carefully in her hand as she wrapped an arm over the pained Seifer. Then she turned to Squall, and with a little wave, mingled into the crowd with her boyfriend.  
  
_Her boyfriend…_ Squall still couldn't believe she was back with Seifer. But that one moment… just being near her again… He breathed deep, the scent of Rinoa still lingering in the air. He missed her **so** much; he just had never been to admit it to himself before.  
  
Even after two years, she hadn't changed. And Squall wouldn't have it any other way: carefree, beautiful, impulsive… she made his heart race. Jealousy quickly coursed through his veins as the thought of Seifer and Rinoa as a couple entered his mind. Were they really together, or was Rinoa just using him to make him jealous? It **was** something Rinoa would do…  
  
But as his eyes located them again, he went against that thought. They were having fun; teasing each other and laughing… almost like **he** used to do with her… or rather, almost like **she** used to do with **him**. Trying to get a little breather from the current events, he made his way to the balcony outside, where he and Rinoa had shared their first kiss.  
  
He looked up painfully at the sky, hoping for some sign that would show him that marrying Quistis was wrong; that **Rinoa** was the one he loved all along; that 'Squall and Rinoa' were meant for each other…  
  
He swallowed hard, searching desperately for a sign… a **shooting star**, to be exact…  
  
And he was deeply disappointed when none appeared.  
  
He sighed heavily. _We're too different. We're leading different lives… we don't belong together_, he convinced himself as he turned around, retreating sadly back to the ballroom.  
  
Once he fully disappeared from the balcony, a shooting star quickly shot across the midnight sky amongst the other twinkling stars…  
  


*

  
  
**Author's Note**: Yes, it looks like a Squall/Rinoa for sure. *sighs* Sorry, Squall/Quistis fans… but I don't know. I could turn it around. I just need some suggestions and things if you want a Squall/Quistis. Reviews, please! Flames are accepted as always, as long as they are tact and helpful along the way… Oh, and I forgot to put up a disclaimer, so… all characters of Final Fantasy VIII are not mine, and they never will be; they are copyright Squaresoft.  
  
So please review!… Reviews make me happy and motivated. Thank you very much! XD  
  
Oh, yes; I also found that listening to the piano solo of Utada Hikaru's "First Love" has a magical touch when you're reading. The lyrics to it are pretty good, too; they describe Squall's feelings completely (even though a woman is singing the song XD) in this story.  
  



	3. Shocking Announcement

  
  
**Title**: Heal My Heart Once More  
  
**Rating**: PG for now  
  
**Summary**: [Seifer/Rinoa/Squall/Quistis] Afraid of their growing relationship, Squall Leonhart tries to break off all ties to Rinoa Heartilly. But two years later, when fate brings them together once again, he realizes he never stopped caring for her. Thing is, **she has**.   
  
**Author's Note**: Yay! More reviews! They make me feel so loved and appreciated. ^^; Okay, Squall may be a little OOC (Out Of Character, for those of you who don't know) in this chapter, so please forgive me. He'll be acting a little OOC because he's feeling weird now that he's seen Rinoa. But don't worry, it'll all get fixed up at the end. Not a lot of Quistis in this chapter, but I am surprised at how many people still wanted a Quall. Well, we'll see. She'll play a bigger role next chapter, I promise. I'm still getting the feeling to make this a Squinoa, but don't lose hope, Quall fans. I'll put some twists and turns, and if all else fails… then Squinoa it is. I mean, you can't really beat that couple; Squinoa is **the** couple of all the Final Fantasy series… but of course, I **am** biased. Yes, I know there's a lot of Squinoas already, but… wah; I can't help it. v.v; Oh, and thank you for all the very nice reviews I've received. You are all too kind. Oh, and I forgot to put up a disclaimer, so… I do not own any of the Final Fantasy VIII characters, so please don't sue me. Read and review, please! They make me motivated to write the next chapter! :D  
  
**Cassandra**— that is **so** freaky that you were listening to First Love when I mentioned it… and I'd have to disagree with some of you strict Squinoa fans— Qualls do not "suck." I'm sorry, but people are entitled to their own opinions, just like you, but please be careful. Don't get too offensive and mad at the Quall fans. Same goes for the Quall fans: please don't diss Rinoa or the coupling of Squall/Rinoa. I had a fic similar to this (a Xiaoyu/Jin/Julia in the Tekken section), and the reviewers got so carried away that they started bashing the characters and the saying nasty things about the pairing they didn't like. I just want to make sure that that doesn't happen again… especially with this fic, because I actually like writing this one. :D Anyway, that was my mini-rant… -_-;  
  
**baka-shinji-01**— I'm glad you're okay with a Squinoa, but a Laguna/Quistis on the side? *shudders* I think I'll pass, lol…  
  
**Jade Bleak**— Thank you so much for your uplifting comments. ^_^; And I'll keep working on the "updating frequently" thing…  
  
**Lily**— Hehe… Thank you very much! I know it seems like everyone wants this to be a Squinoa, but keep the faith! :D  
  
**Wynter**— How do you know that I am going to break Squall and Quistis up? Maybe I won't… v.v'  
  
**Ocean Tempest**— Thank you for the suggestion; I am trying my best to not bold so much. o.O;  
  
I'm also surprised that I got a review from the famous (:D) **Angelprinczess29**— her fics (including "On the Ice," I believe) are wonderific! Please go read her fics… after you read mine, that is. :P  
  
Whew… lotta stuff I had to say… sorry about that; I might do that every chapter, so if you want, just skip all this crap. Onto the story! ._.;  
  


*

  
  
_Chapter 2: "Shocking Announcement"_  
  
"Squall! Good to see you!" Laguna said, trying not to push any buttons.  
  
Squall ignored him and turned to Quistis. "Here's your punch…" He held it out to her as she took it and sipped it carefully.  
  
"Thank you, Squall…"  
  
Out of the corner of his eye, Squall saw Seifer and Rinoa kissing. Jealousy took over again… _Two can play at this game,_ he thought enviously as he immediately leaned near Quistis, giving her an impulsive kiss on the lips.  
  
"Squa—?" She was cut off as he kissed her deeper, searching and reaching for… something she wasn't sure of.  
  
He pulled away, holding her hand and gently rubbed her ring with his thumb. "Quistis?… Come on. The reporters are going to find out about us now. I want the world to know that we're getting married… that I love you." Words that he couldn't stop were flowing out of his mouth before he could even think them.  
  
Quistis smiled happily at him, putting a hand up to his cheek. "Okay, Squall. Okay." She had been dreaming of this night, when Squall would proclaim his love to her, to only her… and prove it by marrying her. Nothing could stand in their way anymore. They would have each other for the rest of their lives.  
  
Squall leaned down for another heartfelt kiss, blocking all thoughts of Rinoa out of his mind. Tonight would be the night everyone would see how much he'd gotten over Rinoa the past two years. He didn't love her anymore; _It isn't just jealousy,_ he convinced himself. _I love Quistis, and we're getting married ASAP. I'm letting the reporters know about it **tonight**._  
  
He took her hand and they strode to the front of the ballroom.   
  


*

  
  
Rinoa looked around the ballroom, enjoying herself… It looked as thought everyone else was having a good time, too. She even saw **Squall**, and she surprised herself by being so casual. She had planned that if she saw him, she would simply ignore him. But her body did otherwise. She strode over to him, said hi, and basically left with Seifer.  
  
_Oh, well. At least Seifer doesn't have to get me a glass of punch now,_ she smiled to herself as she held up the half-full glass of punch. She drank some, suddenly remembering the pain she saw on Squall's face… and nearly spilled her punch.   
  
"Rinoa? You okay?" Seifer stood up from his seat. "I don't want your beautiful dress to get a big blotchy stain on it…" He leaned forward to inspect her dress.  
  
"Oh, you're so thoughtful," she smiled at him, playfully slapping his arm.  
  
"I know," he grinned. "That's why you love me, right?" he hinted.  
  
Rinoa rolled her eyes. "If it makes you shut up… then yes." She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.  
  
Seifer held her hand in his, and helped her stand up. "Dance with me?" he whispered in her ear. After seeing Squall, he was worried Rinoa might have retained feelings for him, and he was determined to show her how much he **really** cared for her…  
  
Rinoa pulled away from him and gave him a look. "You know how to dance?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.  
  
He blushed slightly and looked away. "Well… I didn't say that I **didn't** know how to dance…"  
  
Rinoa bit her lip. Dancing… the last time she had danced was when… She swallowed hard. Her dance with Squall… She had never told him, but that was the first time she had actually danced with someone. She was just merely **drawn** to him. Seifer, she had thought, was never much of a dancer… but here he was, asking her now— and it was **so** incredibly sweet of him to, that she couldn't say no.  
  
Right when she was about to answer "yes," she noticed Squall walking past with Quistis behind him… their hands tightly clasped together. _Where are they going?_ Her eyes followed them until they stopped at the front of the ballroom, making their way up to the stage where the orchestra was playing.  
  
She was confused at first. _Why are they up there? No one usually goes up there unless there's a big announcement…_ She saw reporters and journalists whispering to each other, and crowding around the stage. _What's going on?_ Photographers began to try to make their way to the front, and started to flash pictures. The dancing stopped, and people began to murmur, wondering what was going on.  
  
Then Rinoa saw it: a beautiful, sparkling ring on Quistis' hand. Even from far away, she could still see it shimmering brightly. How could she have missed it before? Realization dawned upon her, as she gasped aloud, letting go of Seifer and slowly walking towards the stage… Her hand automatically fled up to the necklace around her neck, as her fingers traced a certain ring that she had never gotten rid of… She couldn't. **He** gave it to her, and he had promised that as long as she wore it, they'd be together… Was that why she had never thrown it away? Because she thought that as long as she had his ring, they'd eventually get back together?  
  
Perhaps she had unconsciously thought that… Squall had still loved her; there **had** to be some logical explanation on why he had broken them apart. Her eyes became teary as she saw Squall and Quistis on the stage, Quistis leaning her head on his shoulder, and his chin resting on top of her head. Then, seeing the crowd and hearing the murmurs, Squall made his way to the podium, testing the microphone by tapping his finger lightly on it.  
  


*

  
  
This was it. Squall took a deep breath. This was the moment everyone was waiting for. He looked back at Quistis, who smiled lovingly at him. He let out the deep breath he had held, and cleared his throat. "Excuse me," he said into the microphone. He glanced at the orchestra, and motioned for them to stop. Then he looked into the sea of people… all had stopped whatever they were doing, and now had their eyes on the Commander of Balamb Garden, anxious to see what he had to say. His eyes rested on Rinoa… who seemed to be holding something to her chest, with Seifer behind her, hands on her shoulders.   
  
Looking away from them, Squall continued, "I… I have an announcement I'd like to make… Um…" he stalled. "I… I'd just like to say that… Quistis Trepe and I… we…" he sighed as he looked painfully at Rinoa, wondering if this would hurt her as much as she was hurting him now. "We are married… We have been for, uh… some time now… a couple months…"  
  
And then all hell broke loose.  
  
"Commander Leonhart, how many months **exactly** have you been married?"  
  
"… any signs of pregnancy as of yet?"  
  
"… planning how many children?"  
  
"… affect your career and the future of Balamb…"  
  
"… relationship with your former teacher… marriage…"  
  
"… Commander and former Instructor… Headmaster Cid's reaction…?"   
  
"… former girlfriend Rinoa Heartilly… What of her…?"  
  
Squall panicked, looking around quickly, and squinting his eyes at all the flashing of the cameras. He walked away from the podium, and took Quistis' hand, making their way through the crowd of people shoving microphones in front of their faces. Squall looked for the nearest exit, and they escaped out the main door, as he thought it best if they went to his dorm room.  
  


*

  
  
"Rinoa? They're gone now…"  
  
"I know." Yet she still stared at the door that they went through about half an hour before. Everyone had gone back to the party since the media had followed Squall and Quistis.  
  
"Hm. Who would have thought, huh? Squall and Quistis… wow. Guess he got over **you** pretty quick… but that's a good thing," Seifer rushed on. "Because… we're together now, right?" He gave Rinoa a tight embrace. "I love you, Rinoa…" he whispered. "Even if I don't always show it; I know I act like a jerk sometimes…"  
  
Rinoa hugged him back, still staring wistfully at the door. Where were Squall and Quistis now? What were they doing? Were they maybe somewhere romantic, away from the media? Were they alone by themselves… perhaps in Squall's room? She closed her eyes tightly at the thought. "I… I love you too," she said hesitantly. _I love you, Squall…_  
  
"Well," Seifer pulled away, "I think we'd better get going now. Let's go; there's nothing left to do here." He gave her a sad smile.  
  
She nodded, then stopped. "Wait… I didn't get to talk to Selphie yet. Let's just stay a little while longer, okay? I know you're getting impatient, but… just go make fun of Zell or something. I'll be back soon," she promised.  
  
Seifer sighed. "Okay… I guess. If you want. Don't wander off too far, okay? I wouldn't want to lose you now. And I don't want to look for you for an hour… Be careful," he added as he kissed the top of her head. He was feeling a little overprotective now that Rinoa was acting strange… Perhaps it was because of seeing Squall again… but Seifer prayed to Hyne that that was **not** the problem; he didn't need Squall Leonhart butting into his life again.  
  


*

  
  
Rinoa placed her palms on the ledge of the balcony, unaware that Squall had been there moments before. She sighed heavily as she stared at the midnight sky. The emotions that she was feeling were a burden to her; she wasn't sure what she wanted to do. On one hand, there was Squall… she didn't **want** to have feelings for him, yet somehow she did. She knew it. But then there was Seifer… who loved her more than anything… They had been through so much, and he was always there with her…  
  
Her hand clutched the ring Squall had given her years ago. Angrily, she tore it away from her neck, holding it up as it shone in the moonlight. The symbol of Squall's love for her… it no longer existed; there was no use for it anymore. She should've gotten rid of it years ago… but maybe she had hoped Squall would come back to her. It was evident that that would never happen now… not while he was married to Quistis, anyway. But even then… Rinoa felt it wrong. Her love for him was so wrong… and yet it felt so **right**. She couldn't explain it.  
  
She felt like throwing the ring and chain far away into the night, where she would never see it again… but something stopped her. Sure, she could throw away the ring Squall had given her… but she could **never** throw away her feelings for him. Tears formed in her eyes as she realized that she **still** loved him… even after he had broken them apart… and her heart in the process. But she couldn't do anything about it now. Squall was occupied with his new life— which now revolved around Quistis, not her. She shouldn't— and couldn't— interfere with her friend's life. Even if her friend was married to the only man that she had ever **truly** loved.  
  
Suddenly, Rinoa heard a voice behind her, which interrupted her thoughts. "Rinny… What are you doing?"  
  
She whirled around, startled.  
  


*

  
  
**Author's Note**: Haha… a little cliffhanger. Mwuahaha. I'm evil when I want to be. :D But it's not that big of a cliffhanger, just a mini one. You'll get over it. Annnd… you know the drill: please read and review, and leave tactful comments if you can. Flames are accepted, as long as they are helpful and mature. Thank you!  
  



End file.
